1. Find the nearest pregnant woman, and pose beside her. Cue arm pose, and purse lips.
|If no pregnant woman is available, force a stranger to shove a basketball up their onesie.
|They gave us free drinks for this! It was like magic- we just went up to the bar, and ordered drinks. Totally hot star.
|This child's thinking, "help me!"
|I found her again! Perfect timing.
|Make sure you pose for the before photo...
|And, the after. Even though this was mere minutes later, it makes you look hardcore.
|This poor child.
|For example, I didn't notice at the time how proud Carter was of me.
7. Wear a ridiculously large hat to draw people's attention up.
|Huge hat, low shirt. All I care about is more food to my right.
There you have it, friends.
And just when you think you couldn't handle a week's vacation away with your family, here's our family Christmas photo:
I'm pretty sure I covered all of the important ones, but what are your tips to stay hot and sexy on the beach?